Just sent this to a friend of mine. Figured it might help someone.
1. Working out is hard work, but it is easier if you find something that you like to do. For example - my wife goes to the gym, but she has a lot more motivation when we're doing other things together like playing tennis or throwing around a football. I"m not saying "skip the gym", but i am saying that the gym and a gym membership aren't necessities for everyone. You might do well with a video series...or with a private personal trainer.
2. Diet will get you farther than exercise. Ultimately you've got to burn more than you take in. Making small here and there changes to food choice and portion size will get you a lot farther than will an extreme plan. I've made small changes to my diet over the past 10 years. The whole "eat this, not that" book and corresponding men's/women's health articles have been really helpful for me.
3. You need your spouse's help. Your chances of success will increase if he's committing to eating healthier and working out alongside you.
4. Skip fad diets like atkins. People lose weight quickly on atkins because following the atkins method accelerates your metabolism - but not everything that accelerates your metabolism is healthy. It is possible to lose weight while making a cholesterol or a blood pressure situation bad/worse.
5. Consider joining a community like your local weight watchers. Weight Watchers works #realtalk...and it is cheap (you don't have to buy their food). Their point system is helpful and you'll get the added encouragement that you need from other women who are in your shoes, who want to be in your shoes or who were at one point in your shoes.